September 13, 2013

Taking Charge?

Some would say "It's about time" others "Why would you do that?"

The truth is I am completely unsure, but I need to do something and when I have no idea where to go, or what direction to take to get there, this is as good as any leap of faith right?

So with that there, I guess one should explain my situation.

I have decided to apply for a real life job, at a real life business, that will take me away from home most days a week!
It is most certainly something I can do, and be good at, although maybe not enjoy? *shrug*
The challenge will be in actually getting the job!  I have had all of 2 'real' jobs in my life, then I have been a mother!

For 4 months at the end of 2001, I worked as a casual Sales Assistant, I was pregnant when I finished that Christmas Casual contract, so I didn't ask to continue on.
2 years later I did a 4-6 month stint working in a family operated cheese factory. The owner was a family friend and needed workers, I decided we needed the money.  It was a great work environment with only a few small issues, but after working full time from 7am-3pm, coming home to an almost 2yo and a husband, who was doing night shifts delivering pizza's, and also realising I wanted more children sooner rather than later!  I moved on from that position as the dairy season came into the 'slow' winter season. 

I haven't worked a 'real' job since, and I haven't had a 'real' job interview since 2001!
I have very little experience and am quite nervous and shy when it comes to 'new people'
But things have to change and move on.

My youngest child is 4, she will be attending school 5 days a fortnight next year,  although I would dearly love more children... because, BABIES, this is off the cards for me now.

I need to move on, I need to contribute more than just the very little housework I do.  I need to move and activate myself and my brain in ways other than playing house and parent! 

Whether I enjoy the job, whether I get the job, whether I hate the job, whether I fail dismally and never want to work another day in my life!  None of this matters, I will not get the opportunity if I don't take the leap of faith and TRY.  I have not failed if I try, I have only failed if I don't attempt it at all.

It is time to transform, it is scarey, exciting, nerve racking and mind blowing.  It will be hard.
It will require me to step up, to organise, prioritise and organise again... and I am going to try my best to take charge and be what my family needs and provide for them in an altogether 'better' manner than I have managed in the past!

In other news... I am still sitting at 96.9kg this is my 3rd weigh at the same weight, I am ramping up my exercise in september with a daily ARMS challenge (push ups, dips, bicep curls and punches) and I have started the Couch to 5K program.  I want to be 85kg before christmas, and I am aiming to run 10km's in under 60minutes by June 2014...
These are my current goals! Hopefully I will kick it!
Thanks to Kate and Blackmores, for OperationMOVE and the MyBlackmores program, they provide much needed support, encouragement and information.

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